The archives...past Sheroes features
September 2006
Adoption...Laurie's story
Hi my name is Laurie, I am a 32yr old single black female (so many adjectives!) I am writing to share my story with you about adoption.
I have been broody since I can remember what the actual word meant! (I'm sure my sister can vouch for that!). Anyway, having not had much luck on the 'Lurve' front, I resided myself to the possibility that I may (just may) stay single for a lot longer than I anticipated. I became a born-again Christian a few years ago after battling with bouts of depression and loneliness. I truly believe that I found from this experience, my place in this world (corny!).
Settling into my career as a Drama teacher, I soon found that I was itching for somewhere new to take my life. It was then (although I've toyed with the idea for a long time) that I decided to look into the area of adoption. My local authority wrote to my Pastor at church and asked him to put up a letter which was basically looking for prospective adopters to come forward. I jumped at the chance and went to an Open Evening to find out more information.
I was very surprised at how little the turn-out was. Not to say the lack of ethnic representation. The evening was extremely informative and the borough quite blatantly pointed out that they were especially interested in hearing from black and mixed families as the majority of children in their care (25/35) waiting for a 'new' family were from these backgrounds. They were also very supportive of single adopters coming forward and deemed them just as worthy to the cause, as it were.
After this I completed an application form and within weeks was invited to a Preparation course. This was where a small group of people came together to find out in depth about all of the many facets of adoption from the viewpoint of adoptees, adopters, those who gave their children up for adoption and from a medical/psychological point. Whilst really interesting, it was also quite difficult to hear about reasons why and effects that adoption had on children. For example; it is not uncommon for a child of 2 to have lived with several foster carers before being placed with a family permanently.
Despite all of this I was not put-off and still wanted to proceed, by now my family and friends knew of my intentions and for the best part I received a lot of best wishes.
I was then assigned a social worker of my own who visits me on a regular basis in my home to compile a report about me to take to panel.
This is currently the stage I am at now. I have been meeting with my social worker since last September and whilst it is coming to an end, there have still been a few setbacks like illness on her part, other work commitments, holidays, broken bones you name it…
I am now due to go to panel in December; which is where a panel of about 11 people will look over my report/profile and make a decision about whether or not to approve me as an adopter. I am sooo excited by this but also very anxious because lets face it, nothings ever definite until its definite…I dread to think what I'm going to be like come the night before…
I would just like to say though that regardless of what happens, God is in control and he knows best!! This is going to be one helluva experience but well worth every minute.
Just in case anyone is interested in adoption here is a great website with really up-to-date information:
www.adoption.org
Also your local authority should be able to give you loads of advice.
Take care and I'll keep you posted…
So, do we Shoot the Messenger?
So, did you see the BBC2 programme last month? For those of you that missed it, Sharon Foster's play focussed on central character Joe Pascale, a Black school teacher who is falsely accused of assaulting a young boy and ends up being ostriscised by the Black community.
Joe decides that he 'hates Black people' and the play shows his struggle to find anything redeeming about his own race. Joe voices some very strong views and some of the comments which have upset many viewers who called the play 'racist' - even though Sharon Foster is Black herself.
The comments have been wide ranging (just take a look at the BBC website!), but we here at Sheroes would be really interested to hear from those of you out there who did see it. We are not going to give an opinion one way or another as we don't want to lead your thoughts.
Please - log on to the forum and register your opinion, good or bad!! If you want to read some of the comments or see a few clips from the show log on to:
www.bbc.co.uk/drama/shootthemessenger/